23 Plucked Out Of 2023
This has been an incredible year - ensconced within it are
some major landmarks -
200 episodes of my podcast Uncut Poetry,
100 editions of this newsletter (hallelujah!),
tons of funds raised for my favourite NGOs -
major highs (a son getting married is neat!),
one of the worst decisions of my life (and the role regrets play in our lives),
three fantastic life-changing books (which I will read once every year!) and
homegrown lessons on how to fend negativity and mendacity in our lives!
But above it all, this year was the year of having the sheer privilege and pleasure and honour and fulfilment of being surrounded by some of the most wondrous people on the earth. People who have nourished me, enriched me, helped me, and with whom walking alongside itself has been a privilege. I would have been lesser without them. And am often much more just because of their presence, their giving, their generosity.
I have realised people don’t have to be lifelong travellers to make a difference in our lives. Even those who are companions for a short distance can leave us richer. Angels often come and go anonymously.
The need to keep one’s soul nourished is continuous - and the means to do so are embedded in the very minute we are living the immediate life.
As I age, I recognise how finite life is, and that gives both an urgency to hurry as also the need to savour. And the greatest pleasure of life comes embedded in the way I can balance both the needs.
This list, then, is a recap, a reminder and a tale to carry forward. Dear reader, I hope it grows to mean something for you too.
In the entire spectrum of difficulties of personal and professional lives, the most complex challenge is still relating to relationships.
Trust one’s own instinct (and oneself’s alone) for all complex decisions - listen to everybody respectfully, tweak, but run with what your practical heart says.
Most tears are manipulative. Recognise true pain before you take your decision.
Regret a poor decision, immerse in its sorrow, experience the pain - and then move on. Later, much later, when you look back, you will see how it all fits in perfectly.
Trust the universe. In the worst of dilemmas and circumstances, its overriding plan for us is to flourish and achieve.
Being goody-goody is the fastest way to dig a hole for oneself. But -
Be gracious, be generous, be helpful. Go out of the way to better the lives of others. It always - ALWAYS - comes around.
Never, NEVER, NEVER, stop learning. Always keep honing an old skill or learning a new one.
Praise in a hurry. Never leave without acknowledging good work or a good deed. The greatest of people are secretly waiting for someone to come up and tell them that they have made a difference to your life.
Your talent is an instruction from god to fill the world with its beauty. Never let it go waste. It’s your duty to bring what you do best into light. It could change a life. It WILL change you..
Do things in a hurry. Think through, discuss, but take your decisions and move. Whatever your age - time is always finite.
Disciple and systems are the greatest gifts you can give yourself. Above everything else - that is what will add richness to your life by making you find fulfilment in the things you love.
Never say no to a travel plan. If your life can fit it in, give into the urge or the plan.
A unique experience is worth every bit of money it costs - as long as you don’t go bust because of it.
Go back to the books you love. Re-read them. Much more than seeking more books to read, make sure you internalize the ones you love. (Read The Almanack of Naval Ravikant once every six months)
Write about everything you love - movies, books, plays, circumstances, pains, distresses, happenstances, journeys. Write first for yourself, so when you re-read what you wrote you can go back to the original pleasure or learning of that experience.
The biggest skill you can gift yourself is to say no. But learn to do it with grace, so you don’t hurt the other or yourself.
Except for the ones closest to you, keep your politics in your pocket. Otherwise you will lose out on the pleasure of myriad experiences and of beautiful people. But, conversely, never lose awareness of the politics which shape your world. It will always reach you in some way or the other. Don’t be taken by surprise.
As you age, love becomes an abstraction. What remains are people who nourish your soul. Never let go of those who enrich you and those who center you. In the same vein, ruthlessly eliminate those who lessen you.
It’s not rude to be wanting to be alone. Let people around you know that it’s an important part of your life and is not about rejecting them. If they don’t understand, rethink the relationship.
Giving, being of service, volunteering, philanthropy, must become a part of your DNA. If the poorest of the poor can share happily, we have no excuse not to.
Make humour all-pervasive. Start meetings with it, diffuse disputes with it, get attention and acknowledgment with it, celebrate with it. Never hurt with it, build relationships and bridges with it.
When the time for dancing comes, don’t stop.
The privilege of being alive on this gorgeous earth is something we undermine or underestimate ever so often, as we get lost in the minutiae of the quotidian struggle. If there’s any one thought I can leave, it would have to be the greatest cliche of all times, but which needs reiteration all the time - Never ever (EVER) take anything for granted.
I enjoyed reading Rohini Kejriwal’s lovely recap as also Aishwarya Shrivastav’s!!!
Do share any which you have loved reading - or if you’ve written something!
This is what I had written last year! It was fun to revisit it!!
22 Plucked Out Of 2022
It all started with the redoubtable Rohini Kejriwal writing a post in her The Alipore Post called “22 Lessons from 2022”: It started a deluge of poignant and lovely memoirs of a year gone by. Several wrote their own versions. One of the best came from Riya Roy, in her ethereal
Golden words!
Add to that another cliche.
Want what you have. Not have what you want.